BabyLoving.com

Choose a Great Baby Name!

2008-01-21T05:08:00.000-08:00

Congratulations! If you are reading this article you are probably expecting a new baby. What an exciting time for you.

I recently talked to a number of parents and grandparents on how they made their name choices. There appeared to be two basic camps in the naming of babies – family names or non-family names.

I found this to be odd, because when my children were born, my husband and I both assumed we would name our children after their grandparents. When my sister had her children I wondered how far back in our family tree she had to go to find the names she chose. I only found out recently that she intentionally chose non-family names.

For those of us that choose family names, the choices are usually based on uncles, aunts and grandparents. But with a little bit of research, the family tree provides a wealth of unusual and beautiful family names. In my family tree I have found Hattie, Lyman, Amelia, and Serenity. All great names, but I also found Obedience and Purity from my puritan branch and I don’t think I would saddle a daughter in the 21st century with those names.

Those who choose family names typically do so to honor the person whose name is being used, but in my case it was also to provide a role model. Both my husband and I not only loved our parents, but admired them as well. Having lived with my own mother’s name all my life, I feel I have had a strong connection with her and chose to follow her lead in many ways my sister did not. In the same way, my sister has my father’s middle name and has tended to imitate him in many ways.

In questioning others I learned that in Jewish families, it is taboo to name a child after a living relative, so if a family name is chosen one must go back a generation or so. Therefore my Jewish friend fell into the non-family name category.

For non-family names there are several directions to go. For my Jewish friend, she wanted a Hebrew name and was selective about the meaning of her daughter’s name. Likewise there are many other cultural influences on choosing a name. In my own case, my husband was from Peru so one of my requirements was that their names could easily be pronounced by a Spanish speaker as well as an English speaker.

Others liked choosing a popular name. They felt a sense of belonging by having a name in common with other children growing up, and want to pass that comfort on to their children. My sister however intentionally chose names that were neither popular or a family name to encourage her children’s sense of individuality.

She also was concerned with the short names that her children would get from friends or chose for themselves. So she chose names with several syllables giving them the freedom to use several versions of their name. In some families nicknames and pet names are very common, and one of her sons has been Paddy, Patrick, Pat, and now is using Rick.

In the case of one of my stepdaughters, her mother wanted to name her daughter after two friends, Terry and Linda. Since they didn’t seem to flow well as a first and middle name, she combined them and named her daughter “Tarinda.”

There are so many options in choosing a name. On the internet there are many sites for suggesting names and baby name books abound at the library. Undoubtedly, you will receive a multitude of suggestions from family and friends. Just remember your child must live with the name for the rest of his or her life, so take your time and choose a name that will inspire your soon to be born child.

Helen Pearre has been a mother, step-mother, foster-mother, custodial mother, non-custodial mother, working mother, at-home-mom, grandmother, aunt and great aunt. She now works as a consultant and writer for KidoodlesByKim.com which offers personalized kids and baby gifts.

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

Submit A Baby Related Article For Publication

2007-10-17T14:21:00.001-07:00

We welcome submission of articles related to raising babies well. To submit an article, simply post it as a comment by clicking "comments" just above this message. Follow the instructions from there.

We regularly review these. If the article is appropriate we will post it to the main part of our site.

In order to be considered appropriate, an article must be related somehow to raising babies well, be useful and informative, and not simply be a self promotion article. You are free, however, to promote yourself with a tasteful link to your site in the form of "article courtesy of whatever.com".

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

Buying Furniture that can Grow with your Child

2007-10-15T05:49:00.001-07:00

Shopping for furniture that will last your children past the nursery stage is necessary if you are on any sort of budget. The secret to finding pieces that will work and grow with your child from infant, to toddler, and beyond can be discovered as long as you are willing to take the time to shop smartly to begin with. Know what you want the furniture piece to do for you both initially and down the road. Think broadly, not just for the needs of your child when they are just tiny infants, but also as they become toddlers, even teens.

Oftentimes, the problem many parents face is the allure of ever so cute furniture pieces that are manufactured to appeal to first time parents. Pastel colors, smiling clowns and bears, small, even tiny features that fit what people think of when they think of an infant. Changing, or dressing tables as they are often referred to, that fit the needs of an infant and look adorable are tempting for example, but if the table has no obvious use beyond those very first few months, spending a good portion of your furniture budget on it is not a wise decision. Yet that is exactly what many first time parents do. Sure, by the time a second child rolls around, it might once again come out to be put to use, but then again, by that time, many have decided it is just not worth the short time period it will be put to use, to even warrant it being brought down from the attic it was stored in. When you consider what many of these changing tables cost retail, this is almost a crime!

This is a classic example of a piece of furniture that has been created in hundreds of designs as consumers came to realize that they want more than just a couple of months use out of something as budget hungry as it is. This does not mean that this piece of furniture should not be purchased. What it does mean is that it should be shopped for as wisely as any other major furniture acquisition, such as a dining set or living room couch. Think of it as a piece of furniture that you want to be able to use when your child is an infant, but also down the road a few months, even years.

To accomplish this, consider how various models might be used once the child is past the early diaper stages. Is there storage space below that can be converted to hold clothing or books for example? Would bins you add later fit below, or does it come with secondary storage options that are already in place or that can easily be added. Can the top be exchanged or easily altered for something else, creating a multi purpose piece or are there straps attached making it nearly impossible to use it for anything but its initial purpose.

Cribs are another good example of a large ticket item with often-limited use. If you are planning to have several children, a typical designed crib might get its fair share of use, but what if you only plan to have one or two children, or you have decided that you would rather buy a new crib for each child you add to the family. Then consider a crib that converts to a toddler bed or even into a twin-sized bed that literally grows with your child. These look identical to an average crib, yet once baby has outgrown them, a few simple adjustments to the frame and you quickly have a toddler bed, lower to the floor, sides gone or lowered considerably to work as a toddler sized guard rail, and still able to work with the original crib mattress. Some even go a step further and by adding a conversion kit along with a twin-sized mattress to transform into a bed that can last your child well past infancy into the pre-teen or even early teenage years.

If shopping for furniture for a new baby is in your future, be sure to approach each purchase with a bit of a look into the future, especially if long term use and budget control are part of your shopping strategy.

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

Bath Time Fun with Babies

2007-01-02T05:23:00.000-08:00

One of the most blissful times for babies is bath time when the child enjoys a warm bath brimming with bubbles. This is especially true for toddlers who love to splash mom or dad before going to bed. While parents or caregivers usually enjoy the toddler's bathing, many cases of concerned parents are seen especially the complaining mom who is worried about her kid trying to climb out of the bathtub while she takes a jiffy to reach for the shampoo. Yet other moms find their kids turning petrified of having their hair washed. Some do show tears and tantrums and the bath-giver has to yield. Many of these toddlers would rather eat spinach than having their hair shampooed, their nails trimmed, or their teeth brushed. Since kids must get themselves dirty and parents or caregivers must wash them clean, bath time is inevitable. To make this time fun rather than tears, some points of import are described below.

Acting Practically

A key point to make bath time free of tears is to make sure you have everything in reach. Do not leave things like shampoo or nail scissors etc. out of reach even if they would take only a couple of seconds to get for use. The child is likely to make a quick getaway attempt in the brief time you take to hand an item. When it is time to wash their hair, remember that toddlers are often as afraid of water pouring on their head as they are of getting their eyes irritate with soap. It makes things less painful for the kid if you brush the locks through before shampooing. This is helpful in detangling the hair. Use a shampoo that has a no-tears formula. Use a hand-held shower spray for extra control. For comfort and protection, put a flannel over the toddler's eyes. Since nails are the easiest to cut at bath time for they are soft then, it is the ideal time to get your baby's nails clipped. Use baby scissors or small clippers to cut the nails, either in the tub or afterwards. If the child resists to baby scissors or clippers, try an emery board.

Leaving the Kid a Go

Often the child's drive for independence is the source of the caregiver's irritation. But in several cases, allowing the baby to take control of the situation quells his/her fussiness. Let the baby help you rub in the shampoo or make bubbles in the bath. You may encourage the child to clean his/her own face. You can then take your turn to finish things off. If you find your toddler steadfastly resisting brushing his/her teeth, buy three different brushes and allow the kid to make his/her choice. Kids may pick a different one on different occasions (that is what kids are like!) so let them have their way. Before you take over, let the child brush his/her teeth. If the resistance continues, try to coax him/her into brushing teeth by promising that he/she can brush yours afterwards.

Making a Game of Bathing

Kids normally love to play and all situations, bathing included, are more fun to them if they are made to look like a game. To tackle the toddler's possible anti-bathing tantrums, make use of the role-playing opportunities that you will find on tap at bath time. For example, you can take the role of a hairdresser. You can make up a funny style to say to your baby girl, 'Now, dear madam what shampoo would you like for your hair?' and ask if the temperature of the water is easy for her, what style she would like after the hair is washed, and so on. A luring way for washing her hair is to let her do her doll's hair while you are busy with hers. Another fun game is Dentists. Let your child look into the mirror while you clean his/her teeth. Give a tooth-by-tooth commentary to amuse the kid. Try to make her laugh by doing things like brushing his/her nose or chin as if by a mistake. Trim the toddler's nails while playing This Little Piggy or any other amusing piece. Put a mirror at the end of the bath so that the child can watch making soapy funny hair sculptures. The trick is to create a situation that offers the kid lots of fun. You then get the cooperation and also the fun!

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

Sharing Problem in Children

2007-01-01T22:42:00.000-08:00

Sharing one's possessions is an important quality that helps in effective social interaction both in childhood and adult life. However, learning to share is one of the hardest phases for the child to pass. Often you would notice parents who wonder whether their child would ever stop battling over his toys. The fact is that even the nicest children have sharing problems at some point in their growth. And of course, it is not a hopeless situation.

As babies, sharing comes natural to many a child. Babies would handle their rattle or their half-chewed food to parents or anyone else, especially to familiar faces. This is a cute way of communicating and bonding at this stage. This readiness to share changes when the babies enter the toddler stage. The child now starts swiping toys from other children and screams if his/her possessions are touched by others. Psychologists believe that this problem is rooted in the fact that the child is starting to understand and use language; sharing things for communication thus becoming less important for him. Also, the kid is becoming wiser, learning that some of the shared things do not come back. If a new baby arrives and reaches the stage to help him/herself to the elder kid's possession, the generosity of the owner dampens.

At the age of about two and a half years, children start to grow territorial, becoming aware of what belongs to whom. It is a positive, though difficult, stage as the child develops a sense of identity.

Psychologists believe that parents do play an important role in strengthening the child's feeling not to share his/her things. Children learn that parents or grown ups dislike their kids' sharing certain things like a piece of dirt or rotten food from the garbage. In many cases, parents' reaction is cross if their kid shares his/her coat or some other thing, especially of a higher value. The negative reaction of the parent or caregiver tends to inhibit the child's tendency to share at all. At the age of about three years, the child understands enough of the parents' language to give them a chance to help him/her learn sharing. If you are a parent or caregiver concerned about the sharing problem of your child, the following ways will guide you nurture the urge to share in your kid.

The most practical way to help your child learn sharing is by example. Offer him/her a taste of the sandwich you are eating. Let him/her see you sharing your possessions with other children or adults. Also, ask if you can play with his/her toys. Sharing children grow in sharing families.

Tell your child in simple words why sharing is nice. If another child (or even grown up) starts to play with your kid's toy, explain to the child that since the other kid hasn't got a toy now so he/she wants to play with this toy. It is helpful for your kid to learn waiting his turn or even missing out since it will teach greater tolerance and cooperativeness in later life.

An important issue in healthy development of the kid's personality is setting boundaries i.e. the child should learn that he/she is not allowed to play with everything at any hour; some things belong to others and some things are quite dangerous to play with.

It is helpful if you let your child decide which of his possessions are not to be shared. Those he/she is very possessive about should be put away in a box and the kid should be told that he/she can play with them later after the group play is over. Do not force him/her to share these things since this can make him/her more possessive.

Consistently return a snatched toy to your kid while not snatching it yourself from any kid. You can use an egg-timer to time each child's turn for the play.

If kids start a fight over a toy, find another toy and give it to your kid, asking him/her to ask the other kid for swapping the toys. This will teach your child negotiating skills.

Encourage you kid your express in words what he wants to do in an irritating situation rather than letting him grab things. This type of teaching will improve the child's linguistic and social skills.

With your consistency in guiding, your child will soon learn playing more enjoyably in groups and easily sharing his treasures.

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

Finding Out You're Pregnant

2006-12-31T20:29:00.000-08:00

If you find out that you are pregnant and you did not intend to be, that news can be joyous or devastating. Much of that decision rests on your shoulders. Should you be in a less than desirable situation and pregnant, you still have the opportunity to make the best life you can for you and your new baby.

Planning is the most important step you can take right now. Your first decisions will be medical. Do you have insurance? If not, find out if you can qualify for public assistance. Though you may not be able to get Medicaid per se, there are other programs available for people who do not have health insurance. Many states have programs specifically for pregnant women, so start making those phone calls today. Getting in to see a doctor or midwife immediately is important to be sure the pregnancy progresses as smoothly as possible.

Next, you should look at your finances. Babies are expensive as any parents will tell you. With a little ingenuity, though, you can begin to work your budget around the cost of having a baby. First make sure that you know how much you make every month. If you have unstable employment, such as serving, then use the figure you know that you make each week or month. Then determine how much your bills are. Include everything with high estimates for utility bills.

Once you know how much you make and owe right now, you can begin planning for the added cost of having a baby. Begin calling daycares to see how much you can expect to need for childcare. Begin pricing the necessities for the baby. Remember that most of the information out there is intended to get you to purchase the best and most expensive of everything, but it is not necessary! Your baby will need a bassinet or crib unless you will be co-sleeping 100 percent of the time, and you can find good quality secondhand cribs at baby consignment shops.

Also start to look around for places you can go to get help from friends and family. If you know of someone who just had a baby, you may be able to get some of the baby items from her. You should not feel badly about asking; most moms are happy to share what they have because babies are so expensive.

You also should begin preparing for the baby a little each week. Although you may not be that excited right now, and you probably do not feel a bond with the baby yet (despite what books and movies will say), you should begin to do some things for the baby. If you will have a room for a nursery, begin picking out what you will need, even if you cannot buy it yet.

Also begin working on smaller things, such as washing and hanging the baby clothes when you get them. It is tempting to toss everything into the room and move about your day, but you will need to begin preparing now for the changes that the baby will bring to your life. You should think about when you will get the crib and how you will manage to paint when you are not supposed to inhale the fumes. Even if you only spend an hour every Saturday on decorating or getting something ready, it is important that you do not wait until the last minute.

Read up on everything you can right now. You may be overwhelmed with the information, but get a couple of good books on prenatal care and baby development. What to Expect When You’re Expecting is considered the bible of baby books, and it will answer most of your questions. You can find it at most used book sales or new for only about $12. Also get a journal so that you can record how you feel. Although you may be sad now, you will be excited to meet your new little guy or girl in the future. These moments are fleeting so you should capture them.

Try to find a support system as soon as possible so that you can begin to share the good news of your baby with others.

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

Changing Baby's Last Name

2006-12-31T20:03:00.000-08:00

When you have your baby, you will have to fill out a great deal of paperwork. It seems odd that everything has to be completed for a baby just born, but you will have plenty to complete to make your baby officially yours. One of the big questions will be what you are naming the baby. You will be told to make sure that you get everything correct and that you definitely want to choose this name. (Just as an aside, you can change it legally later, but it is easier to pick what you want now.)

For most people, the first name is the biggest question, but for a growing number of people, the last name is just as questionable. That may be because the mother is unmarried, and the father is only vaguely in the picture. It may be because of immigrant customs of naming that differ from local customs, or it may be because of the political decisions of the parents. For whatever reason, you may find yourself with a decision to make regarding the last name of your baby.

The first key, particularly if you are making the decision for political reasons, is to know what your rights are. Sometimes in hospitals, doctors and nurses, as well as members of the administrative staff, will try to tell you that you do not have a choice on the last name. We were told that when our son was born. Because my husband and I are married, the child must get the father's name automatically. While that is true in some states, it is not the case everywhere. It was not the case in the state where our son was born, but it makes people more comfortable to do things the traditional way.

So, know the law before you get there and do not allow yourself to be convinced that you are wrong. Take printouts or the names of officials who gave you the information. You should call the vital statistics department for your state to get the word. If someone in the hospital tries to tell you that you are wrong, ask for proof. Refuse to sign any birth certificate that does not have the name as you want it.

Should you have to sign the birth certificate to be able to take the baby home, such as may happen for a Friday birth, then you will need to be sure that you ask who to call locally to change it when the business week is back. Ask for the name of the person in the hospital who is responsible for making this decision on the name of the child. You will want to contact that person if you are in fact correct to let him or her know that you are unhappy with the staff members pushing you to change the name.

Should you need to change the last name because of the above situation or because you were a single mom who later got married or had paternity proven, then you will need to contact the Social Security Administration. They are in charge of all names in the United States. They have forms that you can complete to have the name changed legally. Most of the time it will be a simple process. You will complete the form, take it to the local office, and have everything processed there. Your child will then get new social security cards.

Sometimes the process can be more complex, particularly if you are making structural changes to the name. For example, a Robert Andrew Smith who you want to change to Robert Andrew Jones-Smith. You may have to go before a juvenile judge in that matter. Never fear. The process is not as scary as it sounds. Basically you will explain the reasons (succinctly and objectively), and the judge will make the final decision. Since juvenile court judges tend to be overworked, they are not likely to hold up the court over a request they will consider small potatoes for their courtroom. It is just a matter of going through the motions of the hearing.

Remember that it is best to take care of this issue before it becomes a problem, so the best step you can take it to find out now what you can do.

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

A Low-Key New Year's Even With Baby

2006-12-31T14:39:00.001-08:00

Preparing for the New Year with a baby can seem like it will be no fun. The truth is, though, that most of us outgrow our penchant for crazy celebrating in our early 20s. If this is your first new year with your baby, do not think that you will not be able to have any fun. Just plan a different type of celebration that you have had in the past.

First try to keep your baby on a schedule. I say this with all seriousness although I am guilty of it. I always want to keep my son up to have fun with him and celebrate holidays. The reality, though, is that babies do not care about the new year. Everyone will be happier in the long run if you just let your baby go to sleep like normal. Then you can plan your own celebration. The only change you may want to make is to move baby to a different room in a portable crib if you will be up and loud near where the baby normally sleeps. Also consider adding some white noise, such as a fan or sound machine, so that the baby can sleep with the celebrating.

After you have put the baby to bed, you and your partner can break out the fun stuff. Try to be good spirits about the evening. Get a nice bottle of wine and some good cheese and bread if that is your thing. Otherwise order some pizza or make something special. Once the baby is down, you can eat together and enjoy your evening.

I always like to plan my resolutions at some point on the last day of the year, and this night is a good a time as any. Having a baby is a big change in your life, and you likely have seen the need for some changes. Maybe you want to lose weight and get back to your pre-baby body. Perhaps you realize your family needs some major organizational tools. Or you may want to increase your income for this year. Write down your goals for the new year, keeping in mind that you have a baby who will be competing for your attention.

You and your partner could rent a good movie that you have been wanting to see. Try to get something fun and light-hearted so that you do not mind if baby interrupts you with crying or feeding and so that you can feel good about the new year. Depressing movies will only put you in a depressing mood, so sticking to something fun is best. You also could watch the various specials on television during this evening or just sit and talk to each other. Try to avoid serious talk, such as about the baby or about finances or any of the topics you probably cover fairly frequently. Instead you should spend some time just talking to each other about whatever is on your mind.

Try to pamper yourself a little during your mini-celebration. Give your partner a back massage (in hopes of getting one in return, of course!) or give yourself a manicure. Do something to make yourself feel good, and you will get as much out of the celebration as if you had gone out.

Having a drink or two is okay as well as long as one of you moderates the drinking enough to take care of anything the baby needs. If you are breastfeeding, express some milk in the hours leading up to the celebrating so that you can have a drink without worrying about any effect on the baby.

Do not use the evening to think about what you could have done. Sure, considering that awesome New Year’s Eve you once spent in Los Angeles with your friends from college may be fun, but do not dwell on what you have done in years past that you cannot do now. Even if you wanted a baby desperately, you can begin to long for the good old days when you had less responsibility. Do not do that tonight. Instead focus on having a low-key good time and enjoy your little night so that you can ring in the new year with a positive attitude.

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

What You Will Need In The Hospital

2006-12-31T14:39:00.000-08:00

Before my son was born, I packed a bag for the hospital that was stuffed to the brim with everything I had read or heard that I would need. When I came home and got around to unpacking, I realized that I had not used many of the items I brought. So this time around, I am determined to pack less but have it be more useful.

For starters when you are packing your bag (which you should do about three weeks before your due date), you should pack one or two gowns or large t-shirts. While you may be content to lie around in the hospital gown, it can get weird when you have company in your room. Plus you will be much warmer even with a thin gown than the hospital gowns. Second, you should take some slippers or thick socks. My grandmother bought a wonderful pair of fuzzy slippers for me before I had my son, and they were a great gift while I was in the hospital because I could be more comfortable walking around my room and the floor of the family unit.

Also take some things for you to do but be realistic. I thought I would be able to work on projects while I was in the hospital, but a combination of minor problems with my son, lack of good rest, and medication to calm my blood pressure made me unable to concentrate. Instead this time around I will be taking only a few items that can keep my attention briefly. Crossword puzzles, sudoku, and word searches all are great ideas for keeping your mind going while you are in the hospital. Puzzles allow you to focus for just a few minutes at a time, and they are fun to do. You also may want to buy a book to bring or stock up on magazines. (Ask around. Your friends probably have copies of a few magazines you can borrow.)

When it comes to underwear and bras, you can make your own decision here based on your personal comfort level. If you have a c-section, you probably will have a hard time wearing regular underwear. In fact, your doctor may suggest you try to keep the incision site far away from the elastic bands from your underwear. An alternative is to get a size larger than you normally wear. While you may not want to do that to pack, keep it in mind for the future. With all of the tubes and the moving around in the hospital bed, you probably will not be wearing a bra during your stay but bring one if you are more modest and think you will want to wear one on your ride home.

Bringing one change of clothes to wear home from the hospital also is a great idea but one that takes careful consideration. Basically you will want to wear something comfortable home, but you probably want to look decent, too. For most women, their uterus does not shrink back to its normal size (or some approximation thereof) until about three days after birth. That means that you may still look and feel very pregnant when you leave the hospital, which is why picking out clothes can be tricky. Your best bet is to get pants or a skirt with loose elastic in the waist or one of your smaller pair of maternity clothes. That way you can look nice either way. For a shirt, pick something that will hang pretty loosely on you because you probably will not want to have anything tight.

When it comes to toiletries, I believe in bringing smaller versions of the items you use at home. Stock up on a cute bag and put travel-size versions of hair spray, toothpaste, and even deodorant. That way you can get to the items easily and can use them more easily while you are stuck in the hospital. If you will worry about your hair, bring a large-toothed comb (it is likely to get knots during labor), a spray bottle for water, and clips if your hair is long enough. These items should be enough to make your hospital stay pleasant and manageable.

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

Tips for Helping A New Dad

2006-12-31T14:38:00.002-08:00

If you are expecting a new baby and you are the mom, chances are good that most of the attention is focused on you. Everyone asks how you are feeling. People want to know if you are ready for the baby to come. If those people, well-intentioned as they may be, even acknowledge your partner, they probably are only concerned with him out of politeness. The truth is that we still expect Mom to handle most of the childcare and to know the most about the arrangements for the kids. Even if that mom is working, going to school full-time, and trying to take care of a household, many people still have the expectation that she will be on top of the baby situation that Dad is not.

If you are the mom in this situation, you should think about your partner and how he feels. Is he involved? Chances are that he is, especially if you are a contemporary couple. More men than ever want to take an active role in the lives of their children. Many of them, like my own husband, grew up with fathers who worked and provided well for the family, but memories of Dad are precious few.

Still, there is nothing out there to prepare anyone for this shift in relationship standards. There are some things you can do to ease Dad into the role, however. First be sure that you discuss everything with him. Like with weddings, baby planning can become a family affair with your mother, your mother-in-law, aunts, cousins, sisters, and friends all adding their two cents. Make sure Dad does not get left out of that loop, though. Make him a core part of the planning. If he hates Winnie-the-Pooh, do not pick that for your nursery theme! Dad counts equally here, so keep that in mind.

Once the baby arrives, know that Dad will be tired, too. If you have set up a schedule that requires you to get up all night, which is probably the case if you are a first-time mom, then you should get your rest. Do not go without sleep but allow Dad to get some rest, too. Perhaps he needs a couple of hours one night a week to hang out with friends or to read a good book. Give him that time. Remember that your free time will become precious when the baby is born, so try to give him the opportunity to enjoy some as well.

Avoid whatever urge you may have to correct his childcare techniques. Sure, if you think he is doing something dangerous, go ahead and say something. If he is bottled feeding and the baby will just spit up because she is not being burped, let him know gently. Otherwise, back off. He does not need your help. It will make him self-conscious. Think of it this way. Why are you spending your life with this man? If he is competent to be your life partner, then he probably can handle a baby as well. There may be a sharp learning curve (after all, how many men were regular babysitters in high school?), but he will get the hang of it.

Praise Dad when necessary. Do not take him for granted. While you may not feel like thanking him for getting up one time last night when you had to get up 12 times with the baby, he will feel much better about himself if he hears the occasional comment of gratitude.

Also do not allow others to mistreat Dad. If you see that others are correcting him in public, gently take over the care of the baby to diffuse the situation or comment on how wonderful your husband is at child-rearing. Try to turn the episode into something positive and give the others a subtle hint to stay away in the process.

Be sure that you take the new dad into account when you are making plans. You likely will need someone to drive you to the doctor, for example, and you need to allow your husband to make the final decision on the day and time if he will be getting off work to take you. Remember that he is an equal partner, so treat him that way.

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

The Nesting Instinct

2006-12-31T14:38:00.001-08:00

Nesting is not a term that is used very often anymore to describe women who are pregnant. We most often hear it today referring to animals, but the instinct still applies. Most pregnant women will tell you that they experienced some type of nesting during their pregnancy, most likely in the third trimester. Nesting is an instinct that kicks in that almost seems to require an expectant mother to work on her organizational skills and put her house in order.

Many women find that in the last weeks of pregnancy, they are unable to focus because of what they consider chaos around them. This chaos may exists, or it may be something that the mother imagines she is feeling. Many women will spend their time, even into the wee hours of the morning, putting together outfits for the baby, making the house look perfect, and cleaning out closets. This desire is something that many women feel is a compulsion. I remember being up several nights in a row until 5 or 6 in the morning when I was pregnant with my son. I could not explain the desire (or where I got the energy), but I felt it. I could not stop myself, and I was hurt if my husband even dared to suggest that I not stay up to work on perfecting the nursery.

If you find yourself in the nesting mood, there are ways you can work with it to combat the mood and to allow it to help you. First, if you begin to feel the need to clean out everything in your house, ask yourself whether it needs to be done. Be serious here. In some homes, it does need to be done. Some parents truly are not prepared for the arrival of their child, so if you have a nursery that is not complete or you do not have everything you need for the baby, allow the nesting instinct to guide you toward putting the nursery together.

Once you feel the nursery is in order, look at the other rooms in the house. Some women say that they feel drawn to certain areas. They may want to work on the bedroom closet, for instance, or the basement may be what drives them bonkers. If you have strong feelings about one area of your home, look at it seriously. Ask yourself whether or not it needs to be cleaned out. You may discover that your closet is in disarray, but you most likely will find that you can deal with the way it is right now. After all, you are currently dealing with it, so it must not bother you enough to want to change it.

Still, the nesting instinct can drive us all to feel the urge strongly. Look at the projects that you feel are calling out to you. Estimate how long the project will take to complete. Be generous in your estimate, remembering that you are in the last weeks of pregnancy when you most likely tire out more easily than usual. The estimate may be enough to make you rethink your plan. If you think it will take 20 hours to clean the closet, doing so may not be so appealing anymore. If you believe it will take 2 hours, however, you may want to give it a go.

One way to curb the instinct but still improve your home is to see if there are smaller tasks you can complete. For example, you may find that if you simply purchase shoe racks and use them, the closet situation will be livable. Use those feelings to help create better living spaces so that you can add a level of organization to your home without going overboard.

Whatever you decide to do, know that you can use the nesting instinct to work with you. The only time it becomes a problem is if you allow it to overtake the rest of your life. Do not deprive others because you want to keep your home spotless. Be reasonable with other people and try to keep in mind that they are not going through the bodily changes that you are. Cut them some slack while still working on getting things done.

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers

The Emerging Truth on Breastfeeding

2006-12-31T14:38:00.000-08:00

Breastfeeding is one of the most controversial topics surrounding babyhood today. There was a time when women had to breastfeed without any choice. Wealthy women or those who could not breastfeed for whatever reason chose a wet nurse, another woman who had recently had a baby, to feed their children for them. When commercial formula came around in the second half of this decade, women relished in the fact that they could decide whether or not to breastfeed.

In the aftermath of the modern feminist movement, many women opted not to breastfeed because it granted them more freedom and flexibility. Then came the research. Early studies showed that breastfed babies held all types of advantages from closer bonding to their mothers to higher IQs. How, in the face of such research, could women opt not to breastfeed?

Doctors began pushing breastfeeding as the only real option, and women began to make each other feel guilty about the decision. Now, however, the research is beginning to settle down. The first study to suggest that perhaps earlier praise of breastfeeding was overblown came from the University of Kentucky. Researchers there looked at infants who had breastfed and compared them to infant who were bottle-fed but held in the same way. In other words, was the benefit in the milk or in the experience of feeding?

Those researchers found that breastfed babies held a slight IQ advantage, only a couple of points, but that in large part controlling for the way a baby is fed negated the effects of breastfeeding. That study was the first to suggest that perhaps breastfeeding advocates, while still making an excellent point about the nutrition a baby needs, do not have the moral high ground they had claimed. Studies over the last few years have shown the same effects for other documented benefits of breastfeeding, such as the immune system benefit.

Early in 2006, a new study came out that suggested that perhaps the crazed breastfeeding wave was coming to an end. Scientists took a group of babies and divided them by breast and formula feedings. Then these scientists controlled for other factors that go into how well a child performs in school, such as the socioeconomic status of the family, the IQ of the parents, and the educational level of the parents. These researchers found that when one controls for other life issues, breastfeeding held no advantage for the mental capacity of the children involved. That is, life experience is more important (or at least equally so) for children.

Now, what does an expectant mom make of these studies? Basically it means that choosing not to breastfeed or being physically unable to do so will not hinder your child for the rest of his or her life as many advocates of breastfeeding claim. In fact, your child will be just fine.

Although you may be planning to breastfeed, it is important to note that not being able to do so will be okay for your child. Many moms who find themselves unable either because of the milk supply or because of an immature suck reflex in the baby, which happens more often than most of us think, should not allow themselves to feel guilty about the decision. Nor should these mothers permit other women from making them feel guilty. Even if you chose to formula feed because it worked better for your life or because you thought it would be best in your situation, you should take pride in that decision.

This choice, like many thousands you will make over the course of parenting, has to be one with which you are comfortable. You have to feel confident that you are making the right decision for your child.

Breastfeeding can be a rewarding experience for both mom and baby and can be a great way to bond. Formula feeding, though, also can be a great way to bond. Plus using a bottle opens up the bonding experience to more players than just mom. Dad, or even Grandma, can be in on the bottle-feeding experience, which will give your baby a wealth of people who are spending time with him or her and creating strong emotional ties for life.

Visit BabyLoving.com for more articles like this one and other baby related resources.

Babies-R-Us, in association with Amazon.com, is one of the most well known baby superstore chains. They offer it all - cribs, strollers, clothing, and more!

Macy's, which remains a dominant force among department stores, offers a diverse line of adorable name brand baby clothing.

BabyStyle definitely has style - baby style. They offer baby, maternity, and children's apparel, nursery products, and toys, and also have a registration service.

BabyGap offers a great line of basic apparel and accessories for your baby at always reasonable prices.

Nordstrom, legendary for its customer service, offers a nice line of name brand baby apparel, shoes, and accessories.

Target offers baby apparel, shoes, and accessories with style, but at a great price.

More Retailers